Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Cabin, Coffee, Condiments and a dab of toothpaste

This past weekend we ventured out to the cabin.  I hadn't been there since Labor Day, so it was time.

It's a good thing to go.  It forces you to slow down, step away from the screens and just veg out, have couch naps (which one can never have enough of ) and enjoy some time with family and friends.

We got there Saturday around supper.  Our friend Dale had plowed us right in so we didn't have to park on the road and snowmobile in like last year so that was awesome.  Once we got in the first order of business was getting a fire started in the wood stove and warming up.

After that was accomplished I started on supper  (BBQ burgers).  However, I quickly realised that I had left all the condiments at home. Nary a drop of ketchup to be found.

I should probably have pre-faced that by stating that my family is very pro-condiment.  Well, everyone except Zach.  ZJ thinks that everything should be plain, so he was in his glory this weekend.  Logan however was less than enthused.  Logan took a bite of the plain hamburger only to reply,

"This is what sadness tastes like".

So in that spirit we soldiered on.  Only to discover that I had forgot the coffee at home.

I can live a few days without condiments, I mean it'll be bland and tasteless but I'll survive. However, coffee?  Uh. NO.

So I ransacked the cabin trying to find some.  Nothing. Nada... not a bean in the place. Serves me right really because I told Dad to clean out the cabin before they left for Texas. To which he did. Fuck.

I momentarily got excited when I found some tea, only to discover it was decaf chai.  Fuck again.

Ultimately I ended up finding some dusty Earl Grey tea bags circa 1919, but I brewed it anyways.  They did the trick and kept a caffeine headache at bay, so that was a good thing.

Sunday night Dale and Court came over.  They brought their new dog Tyson.  Tyson is HUGE. HUGE.  His head is as big as a human.  When this dog stand up he comes up to my waist.  He always made me nervous because he is a Pit Bull/ American Bull dog mix (which is somewhat odd because I wouldn't have thought those two combined would make such a big dog) , but as I discovered Sunday night, he is a big softy.

Court and Dale left around 2 am but had a hell of a time leaving because Court's SUV only has 2 wheel drive and this lovely quirk whereby when she accelerates it automatically applies the brakes.  Not a great feature when you are trying to pin it to get up a slippery hill.

Monday we stopped in at their place on the way home and Court made me some coffee. Bless her.

Court and Dale are getting married in October.  While we were hanging out over that blissfull cup of coffee, she asked if I would MC her wedding. So that's exciting.  Never done it before, but hopefully I do ok.

It was a long drive home Monday because he had to swing by our friend Alfredo's place in Lockport to drop off a trailer we borrowed ( we needed it to get the snowmobile out to the cabin).  We did get to see the new house he's building. Looks amazing.

Once we arrived at home, got everything cleaned up and put away, I sat down on the couch to settle in for a lovely night of Bachelor debauchery.  Then the phone rang.

It was my cousin Jackie. Jackie is lovely, but I knew she wasn't just calling to chat.  So I braced myself for the next chapter in what I have entitled, The Sordid Tale of a Disgruntled 91 year old British Diva.

Here is what went down.  Monday night GG was in the dining room getting supper.  The server brought he tea.  Not sure what happened, but she spilt the boiling hot water for her tea all over GG's hand and lap.

They took her back to her room so that she could get changed. This is where shit got a little weird.

Apparently the server is a nurse in their home country or at least that's what they told GG.   They told her that the best thing for burns was toothpaste.

I'm sorry What????

So let me get this straight.  You spill hot tea all over my grandmother.  Take her back to her room to get her changed only to slather her knee and hand in toothpaste.

Yes. Absolutely. That was the right thing to do as opposed to calling up to the 4th floor and having an ACTUAL nurse come down and evaluate the burns.

Are you kidding me?  The only reason we found out about this was because GG called Jackie because she was upset (justifiably so).  Riverside Lions have not called us because I am assuming that the toothpaste peddler didn't report it.

I told Jackie to report it to the Executive Director this morning. I think it's something that I would want to know if I ran the center.

I got off the phone and just shook my head.  If nothing else, having GG in my life keeps things interesting.


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